I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Randomize
