Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
