I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
