i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
