i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
