toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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