Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
