Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
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