Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
