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• (951): View more from California

  Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.

  (951): View more from California

  Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time

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• (310): View more from California

  The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear

  (310): View more from California

  We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.

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• (516): View more from New York

  and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me

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• (413): View more from Massachusetts

  So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.

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• (214): View more from Texas

  He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."

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• (530): View more from California

  I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business

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• (+33): View more from France

  Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.

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• (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth

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• (859): View more from Kentucky

  I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.

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