Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Randomize
