i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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