Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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