Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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