ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize