I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
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