I CAN MOONWALK!
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
COCAINE IS GR8
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
