Sponge bath it is.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Houston, we have a squirter
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
i believe in u and ur pee
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
