i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
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