i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Randomize
