I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize
