Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
