and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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