I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
where does the pee come out of this thing
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
