Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
