what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
