Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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