His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Randomize
