38 yer olds are good kisserssss
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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