I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
