I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
My Sexting was not on an AP level
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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