just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
