she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
You dont lie about slip and slides
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
