He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
