Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
