I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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