What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Randomize
