I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
