Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
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