Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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