bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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