In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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