Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
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