69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize