so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Your shirt... Was in my pants
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
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