I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
