So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize