Having a random hookup so left but love u
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
