Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Randomize
