Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Randomize
